The Path To Happiness

Happiness is something that so many of us strive for each and every day and yet many times it escapes us.

We often feel that happiness can be ours if only our situation was different or if we have a certain thing. Have you ever felt like this?

So often we get caught up in the “if only” trap.

“If only” I had more money.

“If only” I had a better job.

“If only” I was given that opportunity.

The list can go on and on.

We can waste so much of our precious time focusing on the “if only’s”. So many people fall into this trap and end up miserable most of their lives.

The problem is that people are looking for happiness to come to them somehow. As if it were something that could be possessed. When happiness does happen to come to them, it seems so momentary that it passes by quickly.

Let’s say you live in London and you want to be in Leeds, which means you need to change cities. In order for you to be in Leeds, you need to make some changes. In this analogy you decide to take a train. The train must be going in the proper direction and you will arrive at your destination. You must know which train you are on, or you may end up where you don’t want to be.

Think of this train as your thoughts.

That’s correct! Your train of thought.

If you don’t want to stay in London you have to get on the right train. If you let just any train of thought into your mind then you will be taken to and fro and you will never arrive at the destination you want.

The question then is how do you get on the right train?

The ticket to getting on the right train is called Gratitude.

Gratitude is an attitude!

Instead of dwelling on what your problems are, take a look at all that you have to be thankful for. You can be thankful for anything, you can be thankful for the house you live in because it provides a roof over your head, you can be thankful for always being able to feed yourself and your family, you can be thankful for waking up every morning and having an opportunity at a new day. The list is endless!

People mistakenly think that happiness is just a feeling like some passing fancy. Happiness is not just a feeling, it can be a way of life.

Happiness can be yours on a daily basis if you follow some basic principles. Here is a 10 step path to happiness:

1 - Live in the NOW

Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not promised, so you need to be in the present. Live each day in the moments that make up your life.

2 – Control your thoughts

You must control your thinking and the thoughts that pass through your mind. Happiness can be called a state of mind and the way to happiness is bringing your mind into its proper state.

3 – Be Yourself

Do you behave like your true authentic self? Take a moment to think about this…

During the times we currently live in, social media is a part of our daily life which we often use as an escape route. We are more inclined to know what is going on in other people’s lives rather than focusing on our own. To us, these people’s lives appear like they are stress free and full of happiness and bliss which in most cases is not true. 

For example, let’s say you are looking at a friend’s Instagram feed who is on vacation and they look like they are having the time of their life (and perhaps they are, who doesn’t like being vacation) and you think to yourself if only I could do the same then I will feel happy. But, behind closed doors, that friend could have taken a loan or maxed out a credit card to go on that vacation and could be worrying about how they are going to pay all that money back.

So you see, not everything is as it appears to be and a lot of people put on a show but that is not who they truly are as individuals. They seem to have this idea that by doing this or going on that vacation (they can’t afford) will make them happy but in reality it has the opposite effect.

If you are someone who spends a lot of time on social media, perhaps take a time out from social media, I like calling this a social media cleanse, and focus on yourself. Focusing on yourself reduces stress and increases your joy.

There is only one unique You!

4 – Be realistic in your everyday tasks

At times a lot of us can be unrealistic with tasks we set out to do in a day let alone a week. Setting out tasks to do that are beyond your capacity will only make you feel incapable and miserable – the complete opposite than what you are striving to achieve.

Instead, rather set tasks that you know you can do within the time frame you are meant to do them in, this will not only help you achieve your goal of completing your tasks but you also set yourself up for success by focusing on the things you can control.

When you are feeling overwhelmed by everything, do one task at a time.

Which brings me to the next step…

5 - Know what your priorities are

If every task is important then no task is important – read that again!

If your aim is to make a difference, how are you spending your time to make that difference?

Many people out there aim to achieve a work-life balance but how many people actually achieve it? To achieve this you need to have a 50/50 split between the two, therefore, you need to prioritize your tasks at work so that you are able to complete those tasks within working hours so that you can focus on your life outside of work.

6 – Let it go

Any of these sound familiar:

Do you live in fear?

Do you feel angry and resentful?

Do you have a job you hate?

Do you make poor decisions when it comes to your life and your health?

Do you hate your life?

Getting trapped in any of these patterns is easy – it feels like the entire weight of the world is on your shoulders and you don’t know how to get rid of that weight. When you are trapped, it becomes difficult to see opportunities knocking at your door.

Let’s say you hate your job, you absolutely loathe the thought of waking up every morning and going to perform this job, in this case, you could perhaps develop skills in what you really want to persue by taking online classes and then using a recruitment agent to find you a job which matches your newfound skillset.

You need to find freedom by letting go of that which no longer makes you happy and fulfills your life.

7 – Limit your choices

As they say “less is more”.

Studies have shown that having too many options can make you become stressed, less productive, overwhelmed and unhappy.

So it is a good idea to have limited options. Determine what appeals to you and what doesn’t. Once you make a decision, don’t doubt your decision.

8 – Be a helping hand to another

Being a helping hand to another helps everyone involved and often the person who provides the help receives more than the one who is being helped.

Research has also shown that helping others has the power to extend our lives.

9 – Invest In Yourself

Investing in yourself means taking the time to relax, meditate, de-stress and for your well being, body, mind and soul. When you do these things you feel great after, which becomes a powerful investment in yourself.

Happiness flows when you invest in yourself!

10 – Celebrate life

When you reach milestones in life, celebrate them.

Always make the best of the greatest and even simplest moments in life which bring you happiness and joy.

There is a path to happiness and that path starts with gratitude!